I have warring feelings about crushes. On the one hand, I love beginnings. They’re so wonderful to me that they’re worth dragging out. I don’t want to kiss you straight away, if I’m interested in you. First, I want to brush against you ‘by accident,’ maybe an affectionate and teasing poke when you say something to tease me, or cuddling up against you just to see if you’ll let me. The kiss comes later… after the butterflies have settled down a bit under the above circumstances.
On the other hand, crushes give you expectations, desires, and hopes about a whole other person, things which we have no right to feel about someone not ourselves. It’s confusing, it’s painful. It’s the possibility of something great resting between two people, and that is a horrible thing.